Monday, May 17, 2010

Where are people who will accept me?

I don't fit in anywhere in HS. Every time I try to make friends they become acquitances or it turns on me and those people reject me and make fun of me. I am a black chic that likes punk rock, manga, reading, swimming, and thinking about anything. I can't afford to and don't want to wear the lastest designer clothing. I feel like I will be alone forever. The popular kids, the ghetto fabolous kids, the nerdy kids, the gothic kids,the AP kids, no one accepts me. I have to make a movie for my class and everyone I've asked to be in it has rejected me. I am always taking the initiative and then make an *** of myself. I am quiet but I try to be nice to evryone. I did a nice thing for this girl who I was acquitances with and let her borrow my notes for a test. I had to fight tooth and nail to get them back from her so I would be able to study and she left me a very nasty message on my phone. I feel so depressed and I hate myself. To them I am a pathetic person who is good for using.

Where are people who will accept me?
The people who will accept you are waiting for you after graduation. You get out in the world, start working, rent an apt., or go to college, and you meet very different people than those in h.s. Your true friends await. Try to stick it out until then. I promise, it gets about 1000 times better as soon as you graduate.


p.s. Hate them, not yourself. When you're out living your life with cool interesting friends, they're still going to be in the hometown checking groceries for a living %26amp; wearing that same old tired perm. This too, I promise.
Reply:Sounds like these kids are pretty shallow and unfortunately, they have made you the butt of their humor and jokes. I don't know where you will fit in other than a youth group. You don't need these kinds of kids for friends. One day, you will rise above them and they will be kissing your feet for acceptance. You are a good person. Good Luck.
Reply:wow!


that's amazing.


you know.


if they dont accept you for who you are then forget them.


they just hating on you.


they some big haters.


that's the problem.


you sound like a very cool person!


and dont try to be like them.


dont try to be like anyone.


just be yourself and hold on until someone will accept who you are...


dont change yopurself to fit in with others.


just wait. =]
Reply:one of the hardest lessons I ever learned was that I fit in no where. Why? because I realized I'm a leader; this means I'll be alone. When I accepted this and stopped caring, suddenly, I found people approaching ME.
Reply:be yourself boo boo. you will find friends in college
Reply:F. uck them! who cares if these stupid HS kids don't like you. I understand your stuck with them till schools out but, try to remember that HS will end and you will make friends someday
Reply:see first of all have confidence in urself and appreciate urself, if u know u r worth others also will think the same and if u think u r useless every one also will think the same.although u dont have stylish clothes or other extras but i feel u have very good qualities in u which is better than being well dressed and bad mouthed. i feel u r gentle, kind and have a very innocent heart , dont worry u will find a very good friend who will treasure u , as only the jeweller knows the value of gem.
Reply:try a cult





seriously though...my friend Cat would love you





hang in there no one liked me in highschool either and I tend to make friends everywhere I go now. Highschool isn't a good indication of what real people like. Join a online group for manga or something...you'll make it
Reply:Don't allow yourself to be used by them or anyone. Hold your head up High and keep your Goals and Dreams at the front of your mind at all times. Trust me, they will need you, before you need them for anything. HS is the hardest part of being a teen !! Teens can be so cruel. That makes them loosers and you a Winner for not stooping to their level. You'll find someone that fits you. Hang in there!! Good Luck !!!
Reply:Dont worry there are many friends waiting for you. Simply be patient and preserve your honor and respect and believe me you will be respected. Good luck.
Reply:Sometimes the school you go to does not have people that are like you. Often times it takes moving to a new school like a college or university after high school to fit with people more like you. I was lucky enough to have friends I played sports with, but often times if you are new to a school or people are acting super kool, and don't like you for who you are. It is not worth trying to make them like you. Get involved with activities that you like and people will end up liking you. When I checked out the first college I went to I barely found any friends who I could connect with. Being in the ROTC and meeting other people from out of state who weren't the rich kids on campus were people I could connect with. Its hard sometimes, but there are many people in this world. Some people who like thrift stores(great for the economy), some people who like Department stores (great for debt). Some people who are friendly, some who take advantage. It doesnt mean you shouldnt be nice to all people, just don't let people take advantage of you. Get involved with activities you like, and the friends will follow.
Reply:Ohhhh please don't feel that way %26gt;_%26lt; I know exactly how you feel because I have always felt I don't fit in. The majority of people shun me because I'm different (even though I'm not really!!) but there are a very FEW people who really like me for me, one my boyfriend, two my friend from highschool. Those are pretty much my only two people but I am so thankful for both of them.


Highschool is stupid, let me just tell you that first of all. I had a lot of friends in highschool, like grade 10, but I had a lot of family/emotional problems through grade 11 and 12 and I found that they weren't there when I needed them. Now, 6+ years later, I realize they were never really my true friends, just people that were fun to hang out with for a few laughs and entertainment. I wish I had spent more time with my true friend, the one I still have now, and more time focusing on school so I could have better grades to be able to go to college/university easier.


To this day I still feel like a loser. I actaully had a breakdown last week to my sister, asking her what it is about me that people don't like. I have a bad attitude often, mostly because of the way I feel around people, and can have a temper but mostly I'm a really nice person and everyone finds me funny. I guess though that I'm not nice or funny enough since my work "friends" are only really my friends at work most of the time... although I love them, I don't feel they care about me as much as I care for them. That's probably how you feel too, isn't it? You put so much time and effort into friends, being nice, offering help, and what do you get in return? Nothing. Which is exactly why none of my friends from highschool are my friends now.


What I think you need to do is focus on yourself. Just be yourself, don't try to make any friends, if they come to you good, if not, you'll probably still be sad but realize that things change after highschool. People are more themselves, instead of who they think they need to be for their little groups and all that BS. I get along so well with one of the girls from work that I would NEVER have talked to in highschool, as she was one of the popular, sporty type, friends with everyone, and I was just in the moderately popular group, as in, we weren't cool but got by in numbers haha.





I don't know if I'm helping you at all I just felt really bad when I read your question because I relate to it so well and I bet you are a super person and would be an awesome friend, you probably just have social issues like me (that's what I blame it on, the proper ability to mingle with others and not look/feel awkward as you do it) Don't hate yourself though, because I think it's true that before others can love you you must love yourself. People who are themselves are happier in life and more easily accepted. They don't necessarily have more friends, but they are happy with who they are because they realize they can't really change. So find everything you love about yourself and don't let how many friends you have or don't have be a factor in determining who you are and what is good/bad about you. You're not pathetic. If you feel depressed, talk to a councelor. Really, once or twice a month. It will help with your self esteem. You may have to try more than one, though, as I had to when I was younger.





Also, if you ever need to talk about something, email me. I'm not always on and will be the first to admit I don't always have the time/patience to help others, but I do want to. (mostly because I spent so much time in the past helping my stupid friends without any appreciation so now I kind of hate doing it. ESPECIALLY when people go over the same problem a million times after being offered TONS of help/advice...) But really, I'd like to help in any way I can because like I said, I understand exactly how you feel. HUGS! Don't feel worthless, one day you will be happier! I promise. ♥♥♥ (if you want to email me you can contact me through my "info" page or whatever it's called but if not, that' s ok. Good luck!! xo)
Reply:dont worry to much,,u will find ur good friends :)


++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++...


i hav the same situation, when i was in my country, i talked to everyone, and kinda popular,i never imagine i will be not accepted by a lot of people.( was just too proud..)


now i was in a new country,in a new school(for 6 months)


i became so quiet,,,and even getting quieter and quieter..i was not that kind of person before,i m now afraid to get involved in any situation,,and get retarded,


and people who i used to speak to get further and further away from me,,,sometimes i tend to speak to them,and then they just say a few words then stop.. its so sad...


'but i still believe one day these things will change..


be ur style..


now im getting to find some good friends(but still not social,,and always quiet)


^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^...


i find that if u r good at something,people will adore u(lyk a person i know,she takes arts,and she's so damn good at it,even though she's new and quiet but people always come to see her project,and take the initiative to talk to her:) )


u said u like manga ,one of my friends she usly talks with manga,and we all think its interestin.


and dont follow people's opinion,


or join some clubs,(sport club etc.)


and be optimistic:) nobody will refuse a person who is always with smile..


good luck.


:)


don't be so depressed u will find ur way,u will find ur sunny day:)


see,i m now kinda happy even i think my situation is worse than urs.:)seriously


and i d like to know whether ur problem is language or not?





btw,there r quite good answers before mine.


goooood luuuuck,


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